8 Ways To Know If It's Time To Breakup Or Stay Together
"Do we stay together or not? It's such a big decision."
"I don't know what to do. Do I stay with my boyfriend?"
"My girlfriend drives me nuts, but I love her. What do I do?"
"I need some advice whether to breakup or remain a couple and try harder."
Relationships can be exceedingly complex.
It can be very difficult to know when it’s time to move on with your life. Relationships have to ability to make everything in life seem wonderful, however, they also have to ability to make everything seem miserable, too.
It’s not always obvious when the time has come to start a different chapter in your life. It’s so easy to get stuck in a state of stagnant ambivalence. Parts of your relationship may be great, but other parts may not be.
Maybe things are good enough to continue, but maybe this relationship is holding you back from something even more stimulating & fulfilling. What do you do?
Your answers to these eight questions will help you make the final decision.
Are your relationship needs being met relatively easily?
If you're constantly struggling to have your needs satisfied, your relationship is likely causing more harm than good.
Is there mutual respect?
Why spend your life with someone that you don't respect or doesn't respect you? Respect is a critical component of any relationship, and it's a two-way street.
Does your partner enhance your life in some meaningful way?
Would you really lose something by moving on? If not, you might want to put yourself in the position to find someone who really does add something positive to your life.
Are you good at forgiving each other?
All relationships have a need for forgiveness. Where there is no forgiveness, there is resentment.
Do you have fun together?
A positive relationship has a component of fun to it. If you can't enjoy your time with each other, why are you together?
Do you share goals?
If your goals don't match, at least one of you may be miserable in the end. Can you develop some goals that you can both agree upon?
Do you genuinely like your partner?
Are you proud to be with them? These qualities are also important to maintain a strong bond with each other.
Are you truly attracted to your partner?
It's true that sex isn't everything, but it does factor in. Do you feel mutual attraction and passion for each other?
These eight questions support the idea that a relationship should add something to your life rather than suck it down a drain. You should be happier in your relationship than without it.
All relationships require time and effort by both partners. It will not survive and thrive on the efforts of just one of you. Ask yourself whether or not you’re both putting in the necessary time and energy to make it work. Is your partner?
Many of these questions are also relevant to friendships and even work relationships. Take some time and examine all of your relationships. As you and the other people in your life evolve, some of your relationships might not make sense anymore.
Remember, you can find someone else. Once you’ve removed yourself from your current situation, you will rediscover the skills and attitudes needed to start a new relationship.
Diagnose your relationship objectively. It’ll provide you with the information you need to make a smart decision.